Leaving Religion – MOVED – www.leavingreligion.com

Finding my own way…

According To The Bible – I May Not Be A Good Wife

I’m a wife, not a mother.  I may never be a mother, by choice.  If I read the Bible, and believe it, I’m nothing more than a maid, and child birthing vessel.  So. Awesome.  It even says it in a way that should feel like a promotion… ‘leader of the home.’  But, then I look closer, and find out that the man is the ‘leader of his wife.’  Even. more. awesomeness.

Am I glad that I never let that viewpoint hold me back.  Even deep in my Christian faith, I didn’t think this could possibly be correct.  Perhaps this was the beginning of my questioning… as I got older, I couldn’t make it line up.  I wanted to go to college, have a career, maybe or maybe not get married, maybe (but probably not) have kids.  I didn’t want any of the things that the Bible said women were put here to do.

Some churches skirt past this topic, but it is all over the Bible, and it is very clear.  If one believes the Bible is perfect, and God’s actual words, then this same person, whether they like it or not, believes what I stated in the first paragraph.

“Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is appropriate for those who belong to the Lord.” – Colossians 3:18

“Encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.” – Titus 2:4-5

“get married, bear children, keep house.”- 1 Timothy 5:14


June 9, 2009 - Posted by | Christianity, Religious Right, Woman | , ,


  1. Rather than skirting away from the issue, as you mentioned, a lot of churches actually try to make it sound like a good thing. It’s striking just how far people will go to justify things.

    I don’t understand how someone can make justifications for a book that says women simply aren’t as good as men. It really feels just as the sections that permit slavery, child abuse, and all of the other things that primitive men thought was okay. It’s all along the same vein.

    If it’s not okay to still sell your daughters into slavery, then what makes it okay to tell her to submit to a man for the rest of her life? Where in the Bible does it make the distinction?

    Comment by Janus Grayden | June 9, 2009 | Reply

  2. I’m a Christian. I am a mother but not in the conventional way. I got pregnant at 16 years old (not exactly the Christian standard) and I am married but for the 2nd time. SO I’m not the perfect model of what the Bible says a woman should be either. But nowhere in the Bible does it say that a woman who works or does not bear children is sinning. There are women in the Bible who never had children. There are many women mentioned in acts who never married and went on missions with Paul. The Bible says that a woman should submit herself to her husband not like a slave or a maid but like the church submits to Christ. But Christ DIED for the church. He literally gave his life for it. SO in know ing that you see that what GOd is saying is that we should love our husbands so much we put them first and they should love us so much that they’d give up everything for us. It’s a perfect example of an equal marriage. Many churches have different opinions of what women should and should not do but it doesn’t matter what man teaches only what God teaches. If you want a good example of some strong women in the Bible look at Ruth and Ester. They even got their own books in the Bible, something that even David (the man after God’s own heart) did not get. I’m only trying to help. I’m no pastor or expert on the subject. In fact I probably have done more wrong in my life than anyone I know. But I hope what I’ve wrote here helped a little. May God bless you and help you find understanding.

    Comment by Tiffany faith | June 24, 2010 | Reply

  3. its hard to know God really wants us to do in the modern world,but one thing that never changes is his words .wives love your husband and husbands love your wife .If we are faithful to each other then we have already won half the battle .temptations of the flesh are the places where the Devil can tempt us the most.daily prayer is a must for its the best weapon we have to fight the Devil.

    Comment by elizabeth miller | November 12, 2011 | Reply

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